New Blog

I made a new blog. It's for my story that my previous post on this blog was about. The title of both the blog and the story are Three Frames of Life. There should be a link for it on this blog, but I am posting it in here as well. so, here it is:
http://threeframesoflife.blogspot.com/

Enjoy.

"Aineira"

So, "Aineira" is just a combination name I made up on the Spot right now. And don't ask me why "spot" is capitalized, it was purely by accident, but then I thought it was funny... Ahem, anyways... "Aineira" comes from the combination of two European names: "Aidan" and "Gwyneira". These are some new characters of mine for my new story. It's a frame story. Aidan Allaway, whose name is entirely Scottish, by the way--unless I'm mistaken and "Aidan" isn't Scottish--is a psychiatric patient for a doctor whose name I have yet to figure out. So far, all I have is the opening of the first frame, which may still need some adjustments, but I have a clear idea in my head about how a few things play out. This isn't supposed to be a happy story, by the way. And I think that maybe, for once, there won't really be any romance between any of the major characters. All my stories end up being romantic stories. I mean, the world is gonna end or people are gonna die or some epic shit like that in all of them, but there's always a love story in there. And I'm not sure if I want this story to be about that kind of love. I'm thinking no. I mean, it's still, technically, a "love story", but not the romantic kind. I mean, why only write about romance? Anyways, Aidan's mother send him to a psychiatrist/psychologist/therapist/whatever else you want to call him. This happens before the story begins. In fact, when if you read it, the only current events happen to be the dialogue at the very beginning. Everything else is... history. At the beginning, it mentions Aidan having seen this psychiatrist several times and, yet, only just now as the story unfolds is the doctor (not the Doctor but the doctor) finally asking about the course of events that lead Aidan to this office. The doctor describes Aidan's mother as being "overbearing" and tells the reader of Aidan's nervous habits. From reading from the doctor's perspective, you can't really get a clear idea of how Aidan really is. But that's the point. You're not supposed to truly learn about Aidan until he starts talking, actually talking. Unfortunately, I haven't gotten there yet. Now, about Aidan's name... It comes from the word "aedh", which, other than being the name of another character from another story, means "fire". I chose that name on purpose. Aidan is the "fire" of the story, even though in the current parts of the timeline he seems to be extinguished. "Allaway" was just a Scottish name that went well with it. I liked the sound of it. I tend to do things like that, choose names because they sound pretty, make up my own names, use actual words for names... Kind of like what Scott Westerfeld did in the Uglies series (ie--"Tally", "Cable"...). When Aidan starts telling his story, the story of how he met this girl, they became friends, and then everything just becomes depressing from there... You can see his "fire", his passion, how bubbly he was before. I admit the story is really sad-making, but it's okay if you do or don't cry if you read it. I'm not meaning to make you cry. I'm just writing down what's in my head. Another character, Gwyneira, her given name is Welsh and her family name is Irish. Her family name, MacEnchroe, is actually what my family name, Crow, came from. I needed an interesting name for her after I looked up some nice given names, so that was the first one I thought of. Normally, names for my characters or mixed up or their foreign words, or just foreign names. "Gwyneira" is Welsh for "blessed snow". I thought it was pretty and I wanted her name to mean something icy or literally "ice". And I liked how "blessed" was in there, because I want people to realize just how blessed she really is. They won't, especially because her part of the story is quite melancholic, but still, she is nonetheless. I chose "Aineira" for this post's name mostly because I thought it would sound interesting and I didn't want to just put the normal character names for the title. I'm still designing these characters, but I do have some really cute rough sketches of Aidan and Gwyneira. With Aidan, it's mostly the hair, but I have almost the complete bust of Gwyneira. She's this cute little thing and, so far, she's got some long hair. I've only drawn her in turtle necks so far, but long sleeved shirts are her signature look. I've yet to even imagine what the cover will look like, and I haven't even decided on which title I want to use. This will be one of those stories that takes some work. And a lot of time. I've thought about maybe giving Aidan a scarf here and there and even have a rough sketch of him wearing one muffler style (I didn't want to draw his mouth at the time and now I think it's fantastic). One of Aidan's signatures =, though, is a bunch of bracelets, chunky and otherwise, and a watch or two. I know no one wears watches anymore, but that's kind of the point. Plus, I'm not too sure how things like cellular telephonic devices (aka cell phones) are going to play into the story. I actually really like stories that are set a little further back in time before things like the BlackBerry. If there are cell phones, they're probably going to be the older ones: Chocolate, BlackBerry, FireFly, Nokia, Samsung flip phones, the brick phone Neo has when he's crawling out the window at the beginning of the first Matrix movie. Maybe a Voyager. Older phones. While I love the current smart phones, there's just something about the security and indestructibility of the older phones. Also, I just now figured out the title...Thanks, BlogSpot. And, for the record, BlackBerry has been discontinued for over a year now. Sad face.

Bitchin' Balls or Creative Speed Dating for Short

Originally written 8:21 AM Thursday, August 21, 2014 (and throughout the day, as I was in school)

In creative writing class earlier in the week, Mrs Brown had her junior year English students put their desks into groups. Because her classes are kind of on a checkered schedule--11th English, 12th English, 11th English, Creative Writing, etc--and all her junior classes needed to be in groups, she just made everyone sit in groups. I remember when I walked into the room, all the desks were organized to look a lot like the dots on a five card or side of a die.  I was quite confuzzled. I sat down at my number desk. All the desks were in groups of six. She said to make sure to get in "corner desks" and I, being confused and sitting in the middle grouping, moved to a grouping in the corner. She actually meant to get in desks at the corners of each grouping. Whoops. So, I ended up switching to a corner desk in a corner grouping, sitting right in front/across from the guy in class who swam with Arianna Grande. True story. He was friends with someone who was friends with someone who knew Arianna Grande. And, apparently, he made physical contact with a couple famous athletes, but I don't remember their names (not a big sports fan). Anyways, I sat across from him for this thing Mrs Brown made us do; "speed dating". It wasn't real speed dating, but she said it was like it, just more of an introduction activity for the classroom. She pulled questions out of a jar and topics and stuff and we talked about them. Well, this one girl had to sit in front of me and she played soccer. She said she loved "kicking balls", making me laugh. And then she was like "what? Baseball players get to say they 'whack balls'" and then I said "and volleyball players slap balls" and we were just laughing over the whole thing. It was a very mature and appropriate topic. Then, later, a girl came in front of me and was talking about how our senior class's float was going to be "fuckin' bitchin'". No lie. I think I laughed at that one, too. I mean, "fuckin' bitchin'" when talking about a float? I didn't even know we were getting floats! So that was good.

Her

Originally written 12:35 PM on Saturday, August 16, 2014

So, I've been with my boyfriend for a while, right? Like, about six months. Well, there's this girl... They were friends. Well... Sigh. It was his exgirlfriend. They had been together for a while, really liked each other, blah, blah, blah, so on and so forth. I'm not gonna go into detail on that one. Anyways, they had stayed close friends after the break up. Originally, I had no problem with that. And when I heard she's having a tough time, I wanted to talk to her, to help her. That didn't really happen. But, anyways, I, in a sense, chose her over me. I could have told the boyfriend to just drop her (I did find it really weird they were friends--but nevermind that for now), but, instead, I actually came pretty close to encouraging the constant contact. After a while, though, it became... uncomfortable for me. I started to feel like I was being compared to her, even to the point where I, myself, probably compared myself to her. And when I did that, I did not compare well. I was constantly thinking of her. Constantly asking myself questions about her. If I texted my boyfriend and he took more than a few minutes to respond, I would wonder... Was he talking to her? If my boyfriend said something and I took it the wrong way, I would think of her and how I didn't want to be like her, even though I share similarities with thousands of people I wouldn't even know exist. My mind would always wander to her and so badly I wanted to tell him to stop all contact with her. I hated talking about her, but I would always somehow bring her up in conversation, it seemed. I couldn't get her out of my mind. I had what I like to call an "unhealthy obsession". I had put all sorts of stress on myself just thinking about her, when, really, it shouldn't have mattered. I was jealous. Extremely. I couldn't quite help it. I'm the jealous type, I'm sure of it. I once even got jealous over a guy I didn't want anything to do with! Anyways, if i talked about her, my jealousy and uneasiness were apparent, I guess. Part of the reason I was so jealous--a big part of it--was that she was on the eastern coast. So, really, my jealousy should have been less, but it wasn't. Like I said, unhealthy obsession. Well, after actually talking about it all with my boyfriend, I started to feel better. Still didn't want to talk about her, and I still don't like it. But I became far less worried about all the contact she had with my boyfriend and went back to worrying about her well being. My boyfriend's exgirlfriend had been through an emotional rough patch since I've met my boyfriend. I never knew the whole situation or as many details as my boyfriend, but I had always wanted her to get better. And it didn't seem that she was recovering very well. There has been a couple recent things about her and the healing process. One of those recent instances was where she had to talk to my boyfriend. So, he stopped talking to me for the moment to give her some solace. I was left alone for a while. So, what did I do? I lit a candle for her and said a prayer. Then I sent her some positive healing energy. A part of sending energy is visualization, and since I didnt know what she looked like, I pictured the state she lives in on a map and a silhouette with her name on it. I pictured the energy to be green, which is a colour I've always associated with healing. Sending the energy put some stress on my Heart Chakra. I was told that what I did was most likely empathic; I took some of her pain inside to help her heal. While it was not intentional for me to take her pain into me and set myself off balance, I just wanted her to get better. And it made sense for me to be Empathic in that working. Before, I had told my boyfriend to give her my number, to have her talk to me. While our situations were different, I felt that, emotionally, I had gone through some of the same stuff as her. I knew that it was better to talk to someone who had felt what you felt than to talk to someone who could only try to understand. While that didn't happen, maybe, just maybe, I felt I had some sort of relation to her, a connection of some sorts. Unlike most people, she was a real person. Almost from the start. After I sent the energy and meditated for a bit, I looked at the time. Almost an hour had gone by since I last heard from my boyfriend that night. So, I prayed for her again. I was really starting to worry. I even cried. When my boyfriend called me back, he called with good news: she was feeling better. I was relieved. I was hesitant to tell the boyfriend about it, because I thought it was embarrassing. But he thought it was sweet or something of that sort. A part of my prayers was for her to feel better soon and to stay that way for a while and to communicate her newfound positive energies and emotions to those around her. I don't know if it makes me a good person or not, but despite all my jealousy, obsession, and how it seemed as if I hated her, all I wanted was for her to get better, to help her, to talk her though it... to do something. Going through my own troubling times has made me feel like maybe I could help others who have gone through their own harsh feelings. Well, all that being said... I still had jealousy, some issues. I always seemed to just be silent on it, though. I didn't want to end a relationship I had no business in or take away someone who's supporting through her emotions. I guess I thought maybe her negative emotions would slowly go away after this. That the energy I gave her would help her heal. That was the intention after all. Not once did I... After hearing about her, about how she felt for my boyfriend, after knowing how close they were... Not once did I think that she would break it off with him. Almost out of nowhere, I got a text. It's my boyfriend saying he's probably lost "the best friend he's ever had". She "couldn't talk to him anymore". She was healing and, for whatever reason, he couldn't be there. She was telling him not to be. She was still, maybe once in a blue moon, gonna tell him how she's doing. He said that's all he asked for. At first, I was confused. But I thought if she needed to get him out of her life to heal, as long as she truly believed that that was what's best for herself, then, by all means, he needed to let her do that.  And while I had all my issues with her, if she were to just up and leave him, to refuse to talk to him, I would be pretty pissed. From the way my boyfriend talked about it, though, it seemed like he needed to let them drift earlier. But everything happens for a reason. Things are the way they are, because that's how they are. While it's rather strange she cut him from her life, my boyfriend just wants to make sure she's happy. And I'm okay with that, because that's what friends do. My boyfriend's exgirlfriend essentially broke up with him. Even though I've had some serious jealousy and obsession issues with her... I'm actually kind of sad about it. Like, a part of me had always wanted them to stop talking, but now that they're doing that... I feel so weird about i6t somehow.

I can't help but feel that I am a part of it somehow.

About About Me

My first post, the about me post... It was copied and pasted from the about me section on my Gaia Online profile (Not His Enemy). Also, I got a free app for this site so... Yeah. I don't know how much I can do from it. This was posted using the app.




Ps--this was copied and pasted from the app which unless you buy the full version will not allow you to publish your posts.

Sonic Racing: Danica Patrick

Originally written at 7:19 PM on Friday, August 15, 2014

So, you know how PlayStation has all those Sonic the Hedgehog racing games? Well, my brother and I were playing a couple of those when I went to Texas this summer (he has two of them) and at first I chose Ulala... the kind of "sexy" singing news reporter alien princess racer. Her stats looked fine (I think), but my real reason for picking her was she was the only attractive female... I later chose Ryo, the Japanese biker, because his stats were way better. (Ulala sucks, btw, don't choose her as your racer.) On my brother's other game, I chose Danica Patrick, who happens to be a pretty good choice as far as racers go. Apparently, she's a NASCAR racer... Anyways, I kept choosing her over and over again. Her stats were very well balanced and pretty good and she was attractive. I unlocked her first racing module... the Balance Mod. The most balanced racer in thw whole game can now become even more balanced with the Balance Module! Yeah, no.

The Legend of Zelda

Originally written at 6:58 PM on Friday, August 15, 2014

I've never really played any Zelda games; wasn't far too interested, though Zelda was great in Super Smash Bros. on the 64, and didn't own the games. Now, when I emphasized "really", it was more of a "truly". I've played Zelda before. Once. I was eight years old, had a brand new, green Gameboy Advanced SP--it came with Donkey Kong Country (unfortunately, I eventually sold the game)--and was the red-clad Link in multiplayer mode. That means I was number two. A chick friend of mine, the daughter of a friend/then roommate of my mom, had an SP and a Zelda game. We did that old school plug-your-system-into-my-system thing that, really, only children of the 90's will remember doing (and those adults that were pretty seriously into gaming). She had Zelda in her Gameboy and I don't know what I had, but I'm guessing she went into Demo Mode (which is the not-so-wireless version of DS Download Play), because I didn't have a Zelda game. We were in a room that I can only describe as looking like your secret room in the underground tunnels in Pokemon Diamond/Pearl if I want to give a clear picture. There may have been clay pots, there might not have been--I don't know. I'm talking about something that happened 10 years ago. Well, now I'm 18 and have a 6-7 month old iPhone 5s. And on there I have two Zelda games. I have the Legend of Zelda: a Link to the Past--Four Swords (get it? LOL...) and the Legend of Zelda: the Minish Cup. They were the only ones available for download and I decided to get them to see what the hype was all about (that's also how I got into Inuyasha). It seemed like everyone was playing/liked Zelda. My boyfriend, my exboyfriend, possibly my other exboyfriend, my friends, my friends' friends, a bunch of other random people... So, yes, I'm going to play those. Eventually.

New Story, New Characters

So, just yesterday in my creative writing class, we were taking notes about this thing called "a writer's notebook". Sounds pretty cool, right? Well, the notes not as much, except I doodled a bunch of ants on it, but the aspect of a notebook specifically for, well, notes is something I kind of enjoy. I take a bunch of notes and I put them anywhere that's quickly available. And what was quickly available in class that day was my writer's notebook that I was taking notes in on how to use a writer's notebook. And in the middle of that and some random recollection of my trip to Catalina just this past June, I got a whole new story in my head. I had already been thinking about a character earlier in the day and then I just seemed to have a story right there for her... And it all started with what was almost like a movie in my head of her death scene. Anyways, she and her buddy have given and family names. I chose these names for a reason. Especially the given ones. And this will be my first ever frame story. The way I'm framing it is kind of modeled after Mary Shelley's Frankenstein (anyone remember that from sophomore year? Or what about the sophomores about to read it? Sophomores, don't lose hope when people tell you how hard and boring it is to read--it's not hard and it's slightly interesting. I just don't like Vincent. *ahem* Anyways...), but it's a little different. And that thing I said about a death scene earlier? Don't mind that. A lot of my characters seem as if they have death scenes. There's nothing to worry your pretty little head about, my dear reader. Well, the title is still being decided, but the main characters have their names, and the first frame has been created. Also, the way my boyfriend's hair just happened to fall while I was messing with it yesterday seemed just perfect for one of the characters, so thank you, boyfriend, for allowing me to take a picture for reference so I can better draw it out. The main characters, by the way, are Aidan Allaway and Gwyneira MacEnchroe. I chose Aidan so as not to recycle the name Aedh, which is actually where Aidan comes from. Now, I am going to end this post, which is good for my god awful computer typing skills, and talk more of names some other time. I will also introduce you, my "beloved" readers, to characters some other time. Until then, farewell.

How I Started Blogging

Hello, there, Crow here. You know what I hate about this website? You have to have gmail; you can't just have your own separate account for this. And since I started this blog on a shared computer, guess what? I have to log my grandmother out of her gmail, which happens to have a lot of stuff for her job. She's an interpreter. But nevermind that. This is a little note about how I decided to start this blog. I'm a senior in high school and my fourth hour is a creative writing class. So few kids signed up for it, can you believe that? Anyways, today we looked at blogs and the teacher, Mrs. Brown, said a lot of writers have blogs and that having one is a really good way to put yourself out there. So, until I can make my own website (which I will), I will be posting on this. Hopefully, I can get a laptop in the near future and will not have to worry about shared computers. I will most likely make notes to myself with specific times and dates, so if there's a post with several times and dates, then that will just tell you when that was originally written, not posted. This blog is to just give people a little bit of insight on my life and to showoff my works. So every now and then there will be photos I've taken either of cool things or of my own artwork. And there will also be posts and previews about books and comics I'm writing and stuff like that. You can see some of my art on twitter. You can follow me @knightofthecrow. Please don't try clicking that, though, because it's not a URL link or anything, just my user tag. My full name should show up as Crow. Also, I'm MaidenCrow on spellsofmagic.com, so if any of you would like to see my profile or forum posts, it's there. You can also email me at nothisenemy@gmail.com. That's the account hooked up to this blog, by the way. I also have Pinterest and Tumblr, but I have kind of stopped using them. Anyways, any readers who would like me to continue with my posts, thank you.

About Me

My name is Crow. Yes, that's my actual birth name. Well, it's really my family name, but I've had it since birth. I became Wiccan in November of 2013. For me it seems that I turned to Wicca almost naturally after a very troubling time of my life. That troubling time is a little personal, but I may or may not share it on occasion or under certain circumstances. My best friend is also Wiccan and, even though it is hard to keep in touch after my second uprooting, we try and I still consider her to be a very good friend. She helped me through my troubling time and I hold great love and respect for her. I've been in a heterosexual relationship since February of this year (2014). My boyfriend is agnostic, but he respects my personal beliefs and religious choices and has supported me while I was still "broken", if you will. I believe myself to have fully recovered from that troubling time in my life, but, even though it's in the past, I know that as I look to the future it will always be with me. It still comes back to me and I know that even though I'm letting go, and have been letting go, there will always be times where it all comes back. You cannot escape the past. All you can do is look ahead to the future and live in your present. I am currently studying Wicca and magick, even though, as mentioned before, I am Wiccan and, though I haven't mentioned this, I've grown up having some knowledge of it. I will most likely continue to study Wicca and its philosophies throughout my life. I would also like to study all other religions, philosophies, and theologies, because I am a curious person, have a great interest in other cultures, and like to compare and contrast and find links and similarities between my religion/beliefs and others'. Though I forget the name of the man who said it, there is a quote I read a while ago that I really like that is kind of old: "he who has studied one religion knows none". It is an interesting perspective that I believe to be quite true; how can you understand yourself, your culture, your religion/beliefs, your world, if you do not know anything of others' cultures, beliefs, and worlds? It is part of the motivation for why I would like to study all religions, philosophies, and theologies; they can give me a better understanding of my own religion, beliefs, and perspective of the world. I also love mythology and as a child read books on Greek mythology on my own. I happen to like to read a lot and have written my own prayers. I tend to be very open minded and do my best not to judge others for who they are. I also like to think of myself as a bit of a rebel, liking things that are different, wanting things no one else has, trying to be unique, but I am probably just overestimating the rebelliousness of my nature. I can be rather strange at times, but, like my Marilyn Monroe tank top says, "Being Normal is Boring". And, yes, I know Marilyn Monroe is awfully popular, but she was quite gorgeous. And I love me some gorgeous women, as do most people, yes? I'm kind of pro-sex/sex-positive feminist, among other things. I identify as bisexual and I have some pansexual tendencies. And, though I still identify as completely bisexual, I'm closer to being a heterosexual who is homoromantic than I am to being a pure bisexual. I also realize that human sexuality, especially female/woman sexuality, is quite fluid and, therefore, have no qualms with my sexuality and all its facets and tendencies. Also, before I knew I was bisexual, but after I found I wasn't straight, I used to joke about my sexuality, saying that "I was so straight, I curved". I plan on going through the Navy Reserve Officers' Training Corps and being a part of the linguistics department. I have actually taken about two and a half years' worth of a Japanese language class and one of my three Japanese language teachers was from Oosaka, Japan and was a native speaker, English being her second language. I'm an artist and hope to get my own books, plays, movie scripts, and graphic novels published one day. I would also like to draw for Marvel publishers and maybe even submit some stories to them for publishing. I want some tattoos and will even be designing some of them. I like edgey stuff and listen to a lot of music, mostly rock, though I enjoy most music. I love theatre and have been on the crews for three plays. I think I might have mentioned this about myself before, but I love to read, write, and draw. My current relationship is my third... Most other things about me you'll just have to find out.